INTERVIEW: Tim McCarney
Interview Conducted by Brian Domingos

Where I come from, “baseball” is a four letter word. Massachusetts is Red Sox country and up until eight months ago, a World Series title was a eighty-six year old pipe dream.

Tim “Red” McCarney and Tom “Denton” Deady were heartbroken by the crushing defeat the Sox felt during the 2003 ALCS, so they banded together and followed every step of the way.

Through the blog, Surviving Grady, the pair chronicled the 2004 Major League Season from start to finish, through triumphant wins and pathetic loses. And thank the Gods that they did. Their commentary and insight added an extra layer to the season. Red and Denton, true Red Sox fans are dragged on an emotional rollercoaster cheering and cursing the team with every game they played.

Publisher and Life Long Sox fan Larry Young collected the entries and released them as a book through AiT/Planet Lar. We’re lucky to have such a great resource available to us. It’s a funny as hell and honest in its retellings of the greatest season of baseball of all time.

A while back, Tim McCarney agreed to talk with me.

All right, let's get down to brass tacks: Have you ever seen a man fuck an ostrich?

Yes. And all I can say is that it's as unpretty as you might imagine. Also, the ostrich seems to hate it.

Let me just say that the book is just funny as hell. Did you ever imagine as you were pounding away at the keyboards last April that a year from then people would be holding it in their hands?

No freakin' way. The entire site was started for one reason: a non-violent outlet for Red Sox-related angst. I don't follow football or basketball or hockey, so I've always invested all my sports lust into the Sox. And whenever they'd lose, I'd take it ridiculously hard. To the point that my loved ones actually told me to consider counseling. After the 2003 ALCS loss, me and Tom Deady, the co-conspirator in this madness, just said, screw it. No more giving ourselves ulcers or punching walls. We'll start up a blog and channel our frustrations through the keyboard.

How does it feel to be a pioneer in the realm of collected blog text?

It's a pretty cool thing. When we looked back at the whole year's worth of writings and saw the highs and lows and the ultimate shit-craziness when they actually won the whole thing, we were pleasantly surprised at how much fun it was to read and that it really worked as a collected volume. It's a sort of "real time" journal of what it was like to be a Sox fan during that season, but it's a very twisted take. It’s an idea that wouldn’t have gone anywhere unless Larry Young at AIT took a chance on it. I’m happy that the world’s coolest publisher is also a die-hard Red Sox fan.

Looking back over last season, I think it was the prime example of the struggle of a Red Sox fan. I know it was ultimately a success, but the day to day reading of the season didn't look too good. It was won games and lost games and "I feel a streak coming on" and "Droping two of three to the Twins? Screw this. Time to colonize mars."

It's interesting how frustrating it was and there's an entry after they lost the third game of the ALCS in which I basically disown them, saying they suck and they'll never win anything again. I almost had tears when I was writing that, because I was so devastated, so upset that they'd let me down again. It's funny to look back and read it now, knowing what happened, but it's all part of being a Sox fan. You live and die with each game.

Do you take it personally that Scott Stapp 'sang' the national anthem? I was listening on the radio and I was tempted to turn the whole thing off.

Scott Stapp isn’t a real person. He’s part of a government project designed to test human beings’ resistance to various levels of “suck.” Also involved are the Wayans Brothers and Avril Lavigne.

Do you feel like D-Lowe redeemed himself in the post-season? You railed into him quite a bit, hell, all the time. I thought he came through with some clutch games in a time when Pedro was looking towards Shea Stadium.

Throughout the book, I refer to him as “The Incredible Sulk,” because in each game, there was always the possibility that he’d hit that mental wall after which he could never recover his game face. It was so incredibly frustrating because he had the tools, but at times his arm and his head couldn’t connect.

In the postseason, though, yeah, I would say that he came through big time. It was nice to see him get a big hand when he returned for the opening day ring ceremony at Fenway. Also, rumor has it he likes beer and pussy.

I'd grown really attached to Pokey and Cabrerra and then they get traded. Is it just me, or did they make you complete think, "Nomar who?"

They were just amazing to watch. It’s funny how OC, in just a short amount of time, became one of the most beloved players ever to don a Sox jersey. The ovation he got when the Angels were in town was fantastic.

Can we talk a little about this year's season? What kind of vibe are you getting so far?

Right now, it’s all good. I almost hate to say this, but winning the World Series has altered my approach to the game a bit. I’m just not as angry. I still hate to see them lose, but I’m still high off the fumes of that comeback against the Yankees. How can I get mad at Embree and Foulke after the way they came up so goddamn huge in that series?

What do you think of the changes in the pitching staff? Clement really has been impressive (his four hit, nine inning win was really something), but I was completely stumped by the pick up of David Wells. That was just a "whatthefug?" moment.

The thing with Wells is, as clichéd as it sounds, he’s been there. He’s been on the big stage. He knows how to win. Christ, he always used to shut us down… remember Game Five of the 2003 ALCS? We couldn’t get anything going against him. Why we never stocked the visitor’s clubhouse with spiked muffins on days he was pitching is beyond me.

Do you feel like there's really something special about being a Sox fan in Massachusetts? I mean, there are all those Fans out there around the country keeping it strong, like your esteemed publisher, but really, there's nothing like pulling up to the pumps to fill up (at flippin' $2.19 a gallon) and hearing two or three other cars with the game blasting out of their speakers.

It really is religion in these parts, and it’s so difficult to explain to people who didn’t grow up with it. My wife grew up in Baltimore, and she would see me kicking furniture after a loss and say, “It’s only a game.” Huh??? Fuck that noise. Not when you’ve grown up with them and suffered like Red Sox fans have. Most children carry around the unfulfilled dreams of their parents. But when you grow up a Sox fan, you’re also carrying your fathers’ and grandfathers’ seasonal disappointments. From day one we’re told that they’ll break our hearts, but we keep coming back. It’s a sickness. It really is. If we lost the 2004 series, I am convinced I’d be in therapy right now.

My step-father is a Yankees fan: does that make him a bad person?

Yes. Sorry.

Other than live, at Fenway, what's your favorite way to get the game? Channel 38? Fox 25? WEEI? NESN?

If I can’t be there in person, I want the Rem-Dawg breaking it down for me. We’re spoiled by Jerry Remy in these parts. We really are. He and Orsillo have a nice chemistry going.

Fox almost killed it for me in the post-season - they just have the worst announcers.

On the flip side, the worst are Tim McCarver and Joe Morgan. I’d rather self-administer a wasp enema than listen to those two.

Do you have the same distain for Bernie and Phyl that Denton has? Jesus, I hate those two. They haunt my early mornings and try to ruin my moods.

Every ad that runs between innings is mostly shit. Bernie & Phyls ads do sicken me, as Bernie and Phyl are ugly, ugly old people. But the worst ever is that Foxwoods commercial. It haunts me in my sleep.

What's your official beer of the Red Sox?

I’m no beer snob. Bud Light suits me fine. Sometimes I’ll bust with a 40 oz. during a game as well. Just to keep it real.

Can we talk about SKY APE for a minute? From what I've read, the next book isn't on any sort of schedule, but are you aiming for this Fall?

Like a bad penny, SKY APE refuses to go away. Phil, Mike, Richard and I have completed a new adventure called ”King Of Girls”, which is by far the best one we’ve ever done. Which isn’t saying much at all, really.

What can we expect from this new, epic tale?

All I can tell you is that it concerns a league of debonair gentlemen who teach dweebs and myriad IT personnel the secrets to wooing females. Then all hell breaks loose. And the Minotaur and Ben Folds are in it. As to when it’s coming out, I’m not really sure. But it probably wouldn’t be before early 2006 at this point.

I've noticed from the website, there has been a change in the art style of the book. Was this planned or was it, like most miracles, miraculous?

The last one we did, “All The Heroes”, had a number of guests, like Robert Kirkman and Tony Moore, and was probably the most experimental in terms of art style. For “King Of Girls” we just wanted to do something different to recharge the book, a sort of Manga/Super Friends cartoon hybrid. And Jenkins simply hit it out of the park, as he typically does. We’ve got a preview up at skyape.com, for anyone who’s interested.

Is there any chance you could get that Matt Fraction written Sky Ape/Rex Mantooth script drawn for an 'extras' section? That would be awesome.

That was absolutely hilarious and I won’t rest until I have a copy illustrated by Jenkins and autographed by Fraction hanging on my wall.

I can’t wait for that. I’ll have to get a print of it.

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Thanks to Tim McCarney. Go Sox!

 

Brian Domingos is the Columns Editor at Popimage.com. Questions? Comments? Love Notes? Email him via brian@popimage.com.


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